Is fear the unhinged boss you can't say no to?
What happens when we're always looking for a safer way
I do some crazy things because of fear.
I take less than the recommended dose (can’t be too careful, right?)
I avoid New Orleans as much as possible (why even chance it?) 1
I correct my kids incessantly (for fear they’ll turn out rebellious and we can’t have that now, can we?)
I spin myself up over work (it must be perfect! even the things I can’t control!)
I don't look directly at my redlight (there’s a chance it’s good, but also that I can lose an eye)
Fear even kept me off planes for EIGHTEEN YEARS! I burst my eardrum on a plane in 8th grade and was terrified it would happen again with no polite way of telling the pilot Alright, let’s take her down gently now!
In that timeframe, my twin sister said yes to mission trips to Greece, Ukraine, Haiti, Peru, and the Dominican Republic, and at least one trip to South America. She also went skiing on a trip to Utah and visited Colorado a few times. Meanwhile, I was left at home with the faint excuses I used “I don’t really feel called to go” rumbling in my safe and comfortable ears.
We usually don’t compare our lives, as might be typical of twins, but this was a stark difference in how I let fear run my life and what could have been possible if I didn’t.
As I was taking a supplement the other day, I asked myself why I had a habit of taking a little less than recommended. And all I could think was fear. I subconsciously push the boundary a little further in juuuust to be safe.
Comfort and safety. That’s what I wanted. Comfort and safety were the chief reasons I let fear rule over me like a boss.
I’d give fear free rein of my thoughts and decisions. Why? Because I thought fear cared about me. I thought it would protect me. I thought it would even get me that corner office promotion I always wanted.
So I gave it all the power. I took orders that seemed a little crazy. I said yes to it even when a rational and always-right coworker tried to tell me not to listen.
And then I noticed.